Top o' the mornin' to ye, Theophiloi! In honor of his verdant feast day, we're taking a look at the life of Saint Patrick! Witness as he comes out of his cage and does just fine bringing Christianity to the pagan isle of Ireland. You will erhaps be shocked by the fact that there are zero (0) mentions of snakes or shamrocks, but we do have the return of all of our favorite Bible traditions: explosions, wizard battles, were-foxes, all that stuff. Plus: one of us might be immortal now?
Topics of discussion: Lent, M. O'ses, Succet, the most buck wild book of the Bible to recite in its entirety every single day, Victor/Victoricus, a proclamation from Benito (and yes he knows they're Scottish), the proper number of times to invoke Elijah, truly harrowing birthday celebrations, Miliucc with two Cs, St. Bofa of Haenuces, dope AF (ad fidum), St. Patrick's actual Dungeons & Dragons spellbook, a hole in the ground for unbaptized babies.
Hymnal: "Mr. Brightside" by the Killers
Offertory: If you enjoy the show, head to ko-fi.com/apocrypals and send us a love offering! We absolutely appreciate it!