The Deadliest Skambush of Them All

Show Notes

CONTENT WARNING: The text covered in this episode contains a scene of sexual assault, discussed starting at 1:38:00. Happy Gentile New Year, Theophiloi! Like Merle Haggard, we have made it through December, and we're treating ourselves to what is probably the rawest book in Bible — which unfortunately includes what Luke T. Harrington has called the most depraved passage in the whole book. What better to greet 2021 than with that sort of up-and-down rollercoaster ride of history? Samson! Jael! Gideon! Do you dare gaze into the fists of THESE Judges?

Topics of Discussion: Christmas presents from listeners, the difficulty of Medieval artists in depicting literally any animal, our new Discord server, the usefulness of thumbs, Jebus, worshipping the Baals, a truly humiliating death scene, the etymology of "cowpoke," the Bible scene that almost passes the Bechdel Test, Gideon, a sexy (???) fig tree, BNRA, the first Spring Break, the Texan Shibboleth, structural liontegrity.

Hymnal: "Pretty Savage" by BLACKPINK, "Gouge Away" by Jammin' on the Ivories (https://www.youtube.com/c/HipHopPiano/)

Offertory: As Enoch writes, "Whoever of you spends gold or silver for his brother's sake, he will receive ample treasure in the world to come." Support the show via http://ko-fi.com/apocrypals, or check out Official Apocrypals merchandise designed by Erica Henderson! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/apocrypals?ref_id=18246

Black Lives Matter. Trans Lives Matter. Heck 12. Isaiah 54:17.

Opening Verse

Most blessed of women be Jael, the wife of Heber the Kenite, most blessed of tent-dwelling women. He asked for water, and she gave him milk; in a bowl fit for nobles she brought him curdled milk. Her hand reached for the tent peg, her right hand for the workman’s hammer. She struck Sisera, she crushed his head, she shattered and pierced his temple. At her feet he sank, he fell; there he lay. At her feet he sank, he fell; where he sank, there he fell—dead. — Judges 5:24-27